Here I Love You by Pablo Neruda

Here I love you.
In the dark pines the wind disentangles itself.
The moon glows like phosphorous on the vagrant waters.
Days, all one kind, go chasing each other.

The snow unfurls in dancing figures.
A silver gull slips down from the west.
Sometimes a sail. High, high stars.
Oh the black cross of a ship.
Alone.


Sometimes I get up early and even my soul is wet.
Far away the sea sounds and resounds.
This is a port.

Here I love you.
Here I love you and the horizon hides you in vain.
I love you still among these cold things.
Sometimes my kisses go on those heavy vessels
that cross the sea towards no arrival.
I see myself forgotten like those old anchors.

The piers sadden when the afternoon moors there.
My life grows tired, hungry to no purpose.
I love what I do not have. You are so far.
My loathing wrestles with the slow twilights.
But night comes and starts to sing to me.

The moon turns its clockwork dream.
The biggest stars look at me with your eyes.
And as I love you, the pines in the wind
want to sing your name with their leaves of wire

Acknowledgement extracted from ZP book

First and foremost, my deepest gratitude and love to my beloved mother, without whose unconditional great love, compassion and integrity, I would never have had the capacity, wisdom not the inner strength to have come this far upon my personal and spiritual journey. I cannot ever fathom to repay her kindness for guiding me towards the path Dharma and for allowing me to spend every precious moment of my childhood with our spiritual root Guru, the late Kyabje Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche. She is one of the reasons why I strive and hope to become a better person and she is the one person without whom I cannot imagine life without.

And to my grandmother, Her Majesty Royal Grandmother, who is the source of our daily inspiration, not only for this book, but in our personal lives. Her magnanimity, love and great kindness for us as a family, have been the beacon of goodness and richness that has gifted us with much bountiful happiness and spiritual fulfillment in this life. I am every deeply grateful for all that she has given, in wisdom, affection, loving kindness and care.

I would not have been able to complete any work, let alone a single sentence without the kind continual help and support of my grandmother, my mother, my extended family, friends and household members(who took many hours of their time to tirelessly look after and entertain my three dear yet active children.)

And of course to my colleagues, without whom this book would never have been complete; their dedication, determination and passion never ceased to inspire and motivate me every single moment during our work towards the completion of all three books.

Last but not the least, no words nor in any life time could I ever imagine to repay the kindness and compassionate love that my spiritual teacher, the late Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche, has showered upon myself and my family. Every joy and happiness I share each day, and every hurdle in life I face, he is the sole source from which I draw my courage, my love and devotion; every fibre of my being is etched with the memories of his nobility, his grace and warmth. He is the epitome of an exemplar spiritual teacher, who is in every way truly Guru Rinpoche himself in person.

May this inspirational piece of collective works that auspiciously fell into place, bring joy, progress and benefit to, not only the people and Kingdom of Bhutan, but for all those who seek the spiritual path of wisdom; may the seed of spirituality be planted within our hearts; to grow and ripen into great Bodhisattvas.

Kesang Choden T. Wangchuck

9th Mock Up

I know there's been a long silence on the book that we are working on, well there wasnt much time for writing, other than on the book itself.
Just a short note to say that we are currently on the 9th mock up of the book and Khun Pui is here in Thimphu to work on it.
And a small picture which she took from Tsali Gompa, opposite Changjiji, of a Rakshasa with a skull cap leading the divine horse Balaha waiting to escort Guru Rinpoche to Zangdok Palri.
Cant hardly wait for the book to be out and to get to actually feel it...lol yes I LOVE books rather than a Kindle or IPad.

You

Crowded bustling street,

weaving through, they push

All these emotions,

Jar against my nerves

Yet a face stands out

Alone amidst the ocean

You, it is always you

And yet you remain only an apparition

a creation of my mind

The reality of you

is far from the memories

left behind.

A spiritual teacher

He is the great vessel that carries beings across the ocean of life;
He is the unerring captain who guides them to the land of liberation;
He is the rain that extinguishes the fire of passion.
Like the brilliance of the sun and the moon,
He rips away the darkness of ignorance;
The weight of good and evil at the same time.
Like a father and a mother, he loves all beings with the same love.
A great river of compassion,
A mountain soaring above all earthly concerns,
Unshaken by the winds of emotion,
To make any connection with him,
Whether by seeing him,
Hearing his voice,
Remembering him or being touched by his hand will lead us towards liberation.
To have full confidence in him is the best way to progress towards enlightenment.
The warmth of his wisdom and compassion will melt the ore of our being
And release the gold of Buddha-nature within.

Private Moments

Motherhood and Practicing Buddhism

Forget ever blossoming from the depths of samsaric muddied waters; by Buddhist standards I am neck deep in samsara and sinking fast. Why? Well I am well chained down with many hopes, desires and attachments that run pretty deep-I am a mother of three adorable and sometimes very naughty little munchkins whom I like to call my 3 Musketeers.

Yes I live in the only Vajrayana practicing Kingdom in the Himalayas. Yes I have a spiritual teacher. Yes I have all the perfect conditions to practice Dharma. But I just don’t seem to have the time to practice or meditate or even sit for a few minutes a day. When all my friends who are either single or just starting a (small) family of their own hardly seem to have time, where in the world can I even imagine finding time with THREE?

Frankly my Ngondro(Preliminary Practice) stopped at 30,000ish every time, thrice and so far, my spiritual teacher has been kind enough to tell me that even a minimum of 3 times a day is enough, after all if you add it up to a whole lifetime, I would have completed my set number of Ngondro. He was also kind enough to tell me that it was more important that I was aware of the present moment, each moment, and that I thought, spoke and acted with pure intention daily. That seemed easy enough and I was sighing with great relief that my teacher let me off so easily. So pushing aside that guilt rising in the pits of my stomach, I convinced myself that He was right-I COULD do this, it would be a breeze.

It was anything but!! My eldest 7 year old Musketeer asks me (as I’m negotiating heavy traffic on an early school morning)for the 16^th time, ‘Moooom….who invented wind shield wipers? Why did they invent windshield wipers? Why did they call it that? How come its one wiper in some cars and two in most?’ and it goes on and on and on. Then there’s my 3 year old Megamind(you’ll understand when you see him) Musketeer in the backseat grumbling and whining to the best of HIS ability that he doesn’t want to go to school. All the while I’m trying my hardest NOT to bump or scratch the car in front of me, smiling sweetly as possible at the driver coming at me, hoping he’d let me go first, checking my rearview mirror(being blocked my inquisitive Musketeer)if the rear car’s getting too close for comfort….well you get the idea.

THIS is the very exact moment where I wonder what I am supposed to be visualizing and how that rising feeling of stomach burn(this means my anger’s reaching boiling point)should be controlled. Somehow I manage every morning for the past few years, but what about all those unwanted wrinkles and frown lines added up over the years? I don’t know about you, but haven’t you noticed how real practitioners never seem to age? Apart from enlightenment, I really really want THAT!!

There are many moments where I also wish that there was a manual called Dummy’s Guide for Moms (who wish to rise to the status of Super Moms) Practicing Buddhism, telling you exactly how to handle a 3 year old’s tantrum at a public venue and all those little valuable lessons of making Mommyhood look as easy as eating a plateful of delicious momos.

Honestly though, I don’t know about other parents, but with my 3-they’ve taught me all the lessons in Buddhist practice and spirituality that I need to know and more. By watching them and teaching them, I had many an A HA moment of my own and learnt to practice what I had taught them about dealing with anger, frustration, language(especially refraining from swearing), manners, relationships and the importance of a good heart and honorable character. It is of course a work in progress, both for my children and myself, but it’s an enjoyable journey and rest assured that there is never a dull moment where I am not pulled back into reality by my Inquisitive Musketeer’s witty comments; and Megamind Musketeer’s scathing honesty of why rules apply only to him and not for Mummy or Daddy and of course Happy Musketeer is the master of calm, teaching me a few things about how to manage my life more coolly regardless of external disturbances.

 And the best moments are when I am ready to spit out a tirade of ranting and ravings over a mundane matter; I find one of my intended victims looking back at me very impishly-this suddenly breaks open the narrowness of my mind overwhelmed momentarily by anger, only to find us both laughing very hard at the silliness of it all.

I may not ever find enlightenment in this lifetime, but I think being a mother has planted a few seeds of wisdom, patience and a good dose of sense of humour to face life with a smile on my face and spring in my step for many lifetimes to come.